tahun lalu gue ngerasain apa yang dinamakan pure joy. pure. murni. kebahagiaan murni. i used to cringe at "bahagia itu sederhana" , tapi i guess that shit is real.
1. gue literally berdiri deket banget dan megang/ngelus/petting a fucking wild pony. WILD. kuda poni liar. which is actually different than actual kuda. ternyata bukan kuda mereka. kuda skala agak lebih kecil. kuda poni. warna hitam. and the beauty closed its eyes pas gue pegang. lo tau kan video2 kucing atau anjing lucu-lucu yang merekanya nutup mata pas dipeluk dielus digemesin????????? that wild pony did the same dan gue TAKJUB. ngerti ga lu... takjub. it's not easy to faze me but that one experience? gila banget............. lo paham kan rasanya berbunga-bunga? bahagia? joy?????????? gue kira gue paham, tapi that day brought up something new within me. gila cuy. gils. gue sampe berkaca-kaca woy pas udahan... kayak?????? woy!!!!! and did i tell horses are my favourite animal after cats!!! ya allah bersyukur banget gue ngerasain pure joy.
2. adek gue, yang sakit kanker leukemia waktu umurnya 15 tahun, 9 years later he graduated university with a fucking cum laude. jurusan kimia murni, dan cum laude. dari universitas negeri pula. cum laude kimia woy!!!! that's my fucking lil bro woy. he could have been a doctor but my parents didn't want didn't wish him to strain his body and brain too much. but he fucking did it mate. kimia. cum laude. that's my second pure joy di tahun 2024. bangga banget banget banget. bersyukur banget for sure.
3. berenang di laut. actually berenang ngerasain ombak dan lain-lain. lompat dari idk pillar. enak banget woy. been here three summers dan baru pertama nyobain nyebur. gila. better late than never tbh. it was pure joy. sederhana. worth it.
overall, 2024 was shit lol. sebegitunya sampe gue baru inget pure joy di akhir tahun ketika nulis diary wakakakakka. oh, iya ya. gue kan megang kuda poni. adek gue lulus S1 kimia cum laude. oh iya gue berhasil melewatinya. udah lewat tuh. allah nggak akan menguji gue tanpa tahu gue sanggup menghadapi ujian tersebut. it was shit ngl, but here i am. i will keep trying. there's hope for me. it was just a bad chapter, not a bad life. was a bad season, not a bad life. anjay.
self-reminder. to look back. here's to 2025 woy wakkakakaka we can do it.
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